Slow Motion Perception
by Queen of the Ramen
Summary: He'd been the perfect husband. They'd had the perfect marriage. That had all changed with the birth of their daughter. Warnings for: spousal abuse and child abuse.
1. The Beginning Of The End

Usagi and Mamoru's wedding had been the happiest day of their lives. All of their friend had been there, including all the scouts, Naru, Umino, Motoki, Yuichiro, Usagi's parents and brother, Shingo. Even Chibiusa and Helios had come from the future to be there. Usagi could remember it like it was yesterday. Mamoru had been so handsome in his tuxedo. She remembered how he had smiled at her as she walked down the aisle before taking her hands in his and vowing to always love, cherish, honor and protect her, for as long as they both lived. As Usagi thought of that last part she grimaced and placed a hand on the bruise under her left eye. A single tear ran down her cheek. Once upon a time Mamoru had been a loving husband. But not anymore... not since Chibiusa had been born.

Usagi gazed down at the angelic face of her baby, only a few weeks old. She was swaddled in a white blanket, with only her face and a few strands of wispy pink hair showing. Chibiusa cooed as Usagi gently rocked her. She placed a tender kiss upon her forehead before laying down in her bassinet. She gave a slight frown at Mamoru, who was sitting in an armchair, reading the newspaper. He hadn't once held Chibiusa since she'd come home from the hospital. She walked over to him and laid a hand down on his shoulder. Closing the paper, he looked up at her. Usagi was a little bit frightened at the coldness in his eyes.

"Mamo-chan... I think it's about time you spent a bit of time with your daughter," she said. He continued to stare up at her, not speaking. "I know it's a little bit frightening. But I know you'll do a good job holding her. If I can manage to hold her without dropping her, I think you'll do just fine," she chuckled at the last part and smiled at him.

He turned back to his newspaper. "I'm not interested in holding _your_ daughter," he said, without looking up.

"My daughter?" Usagi looked at him, hurt in her eyes. "She's _our _daughter Mamoru. How dare you!"

"How dare I?!" Mamoru violently stood up from the chair and grabbed her arms. "How dare you! I never wanted the little brat. I indulged you during your pregnancy because I thought maybe I could learn to love that, that... _thing_." His last words were spat out at her. "But I don't and I never will! And now you spend all your time doting on her." His grip on her arms tightened and she flinched.

"Mamoru, you're hurting me!" she sobbed, trying to wrench herself from his grasp. He pushed her away from him, flinging her to the floor. She looked up at him with tears streaming from her eyes. She could practically feel the loathing and hate radiating from him. He looked down at her with disgust in his eyes. His gaze was drawn to the bassinet, where Chibiusa lay sleeping. Usagi gasped and quickly crawled on the floor to crouch in front of it, her arms spread wide so as to protect her child from whatever evil mischief he could be considering. He rolled his eyes and sneered at her before he grabbed his newspaper and stormed out of the room.

Usagi shakily stood up. She carefully picked up Chibiusa, her arms throbbing from where he had grabbed her and her hip aching from when had hit the floor after he'd practically thrown her. She gazed down at her baby. She didn't understand what had happened to Mamoru-kun to make him act this way, but she had a feeling this wouldn't be the end of it. Usagi felt her resolve turn to steel as she vowed to make sure that he would never hurt her baby, no matter what happened. A tear ran down her cheek and landed on Chibiusa's face. The baby began fussing and Usagi held her close. "It's gonna be all right, little one. It'll going to be all right."


	2. A Gathering and Possible Revelation

For the first time in her life, Usagi was early for something. She stood outside the stone steps leading to the Hikawa Shrine where her friend Rei and her husband Yuichiro lived and worked. Her fight with Mamoru had occurred only yesterday and she had been eager to get out of the house. She hadn't seen him since then and he hadn't even slept in their bed. She guessed he had spent the night at a motel. Usagi looked despairingly at the rather large stroller that sat in front of her and then the many steps. She hadn't thought of the considerable task of carrying both an infant and stroller up the stairs at the same, especially with the extensive bruising on her arms. She didn't feel comfortable leaving the stroller there while she took Chibiusa with her. It was a nice neighborhood, but she was still wary of it being stolen, or even managing to roll away on it's own.

"Usagi!" Yuichiro walked down the steps towards her. "Can I help you with that?"

"Please," she said, smiling gratefully at him. Picking up Chibiusa she followed after him as he lugged the cumbersome bundle up the stairs and into the shrine. The welcome sight of her scout friends greeted her. Ami sat with Michiru, both reading from a book of poetry together as Haruka looked over their shoulders. Makoto and Motoki watched happily as Minako encircled their giggling toddler, Ikuto, with a harmless Venus Love-Me Chain. Setsuna and Hotaru played a duet on the piano in the corner. Rei sat in the center of the room, carefully stoking the fire. They all looked up from their activities and smiled at the trio as they entered the room.

"Hi, everyone," Usagi greeted her friends. Chibiusa let out a slight whimper from her arms and she rubbed her back in small circles, soothing her.

Rei stood up from beside the fire and walked over to her. "May I hold her?" She held out her arms and Usagi carefully handed Chibiusa to her. Rei smiled down adoringly at the pink haired imp who gave a little cry at the sudden shock of being switched over before she wrapped a strand of Rei's raven black hair around her chubby little fingers and gurgled happily. Rei answered with laughter of her own. After a few minutes she put her in a bassinet for her nap.

Everyone gathered around the fire to chat. "Would you like me to hang up your jacket?" Youichiro asked, holding out his hand.

Usagi shrunk back a little. The jacket was the only thing keeping her friends from seeing the bruises Mamoru had left behind. "No thanks, I'm a little chilly."

"In front of _this_ fire?" Rei asked incredulously. "You're gonna be burning up in no time."

"Still, I'd rather not," Usagi said a little crossly. 'But thanks for asking Youichiro."

Youichiro smiled. "No problem."

"I haven't seen Mamoru-kun around lately," Makoto said, changing the subject. "Is he feeling okay?"

Usagi swallowed. "He's... he's fine." She ran a hand through her hair, which she hadn't bothered to put into odango that morning. "Just swamped at work. You know how it is." She gave a rather shaky smile. "I'll tell him you guys miss him." Her stomach took that moment to let out a rather large growl.

"Sounds like someone's hungry," Haruka laughed.

Rei grabbed a wicker basket by the edge of the cushions near the fire. "Lucky for you, I brought snacks." She pulled out a couple bags of marshmallows, some graham crackers, a few bars of chocolate and some metal skewers. She divided it up amongst them and everyone started roasting their marshmallows, with Makoto and Motoki helping Ikuto with his.

After eating their s'mores they all headed to the back of the shrine to sit under the cherry blossom trees. Usagi watched the happy couples with a bit of jealousy. Yuichiro carefully plucked a sprig of blossoms from the tree and tucked it into Rei's hair. Michiru sat playing her violin while Haruka listened in rapt attention. Makoto and Motoki lovingly watched Ikuto play with a red rubber ball he had probably left there last time the friends had gathered there. She could feel her eyes start to water and quickly turned her back on the happy group, quickly rubbing the rapidly forming tears from their eyes. She didn't want to spoil this happy occasion and she certainly didn't want to explain why she was crying.

There was a small koi pond not far from the trees and she walked over to it. She gazed down at the water, watching the shimmering golden fish dart in and out of the water lilies and watercress. So caught up in her thoughts was she that she didn't hear the squeal of Ikuto and the bounce of his ball before it was too late. He came bounding towards her, running towards the out of control ball which was headed directly her way, his parents desperately trying to catch up to him before he caused any mischief. His head connected with her abdomen and she felt all of her air leaver her. They both fell backwards into the water. Usagi landed on bottom with Ikuto on top of her.

"Oh no!" Makoto quickly scooped Ikuto up, did a quicky scan for any damages and handed him to Motoki. She held out her hand for Usagi to take. "Are you all right?"

"Just a bruised bottom is all," she said, taking the proffered hand. Makoto was easily able to lift her out and onto her feet. "And a bruised ego." She smiled. "Is Ikuto okay?"

Motoki nodded. "Just fine, except for the spanking he's about to get if he doesn't apologize."

Ikuto's eyes grew wide. "Sorry, Usa-chan." His lower lip wobbled and he looked about ready to cry.

"It's okay," she said. She lovingly ruffles his hair and he was all smiles again.

Rei had gone in the shrine and brought out a large towel, which she wrapped around Usagi. "We'd better get you into some dry clothes before you catch a cold." Rei wrapped a smaller town around Ikuto. "You can dry off in my room, I'll bring you a robe you can wear."

Makoto began toweling off her toddler. "We brought an extra set of clothes for Ikuto, just in case." She smiled wryly. "We can change him in the bathroom."

Usagi was kind of excited to see Rei's bedroom. She hardly ever got to see it, and never by herself. There were pictures on the dresser: of all the scouts laughing at a picnic, of the time they had all gone to a ski resort together (the picture was taken right after Usagi had dumped a large handful of powdery snow down Rei's snowsuit), pictures of Rei and Yuichiro, a black and white shot of her mother at a very young age and a few of her grandfather, who had passed away a few years ago. A rather large painting showed a beautiful landscape of Mars with the symbol for Mars in the lower left hand corner. It had been a wedding present from Michiru, who had painted it herself. A lacquered bow and decorative arrow set sat in special case, Haruka's present. Next to it sat a delicately beautiful porcelain Miko doll, it's robes made from silk and hand embroidered. That had been her and Mamoru's present to Rei. When she saw it Usagi had to force back more tears, but was soon able to calm down again.

She quickly removed and folded her sodden clothes, placing them in a small plastic tub Rei had provided her with. After thoroughly toweling off she wrapped the towel around her. Her hair lay in a sodden pile on her back, there was no use trying to dry that, not with a towel at least. There was a knock at the door after only a minute and Rei announced that she had a robe for Usagi to wear. Usagi opened the door to take the robe from her.

"Usagi!" Rei looked at her with shock in her eyes. "What happened to your arms?"

Usagi's heart began to race and her mouth turned to ashes. She couldn't speak. She had forgotten about the bruising on her arms, forgotten to cover it up. What was she going to tell Rei?


	3. Revelation and Escalation

Usagi quickly grabbed the robe from Rei and covered herself up.

"Oh you know me, I'm just clumsy." Usagi laughed nervously.

Rei strode over to her friend and yanked an arm of the robe down. "Those are hand prints Usagi. Who did this to you?"

Usagi winced at having the material so roughly scraped over her tender skin. Tears welled in her eyes, but not because of the pain from the bruise. "Please Rei, you can't tell anyone."

"Like Hell I won't!" Rei slammed a left fist against her open right palm. "I'm gonna hunt down whoever did this to you and make them pay"!

"No!" Usagi shouted. Rei startled. "No - you can't. He - he didn't mean it. It was all my fault, actually... I shouldn't have..."

"You can't mean?" Rei trailed off. "Mamoru did this to you?"

Usagi nodded, the tears in her eyes spilling onto her cheeks. "It's just the stress from work and the new baby." Usagi wiped the tears from her face using the sleeve of her robe and gently pulled the robe up over her bruised arm and shoulder. "You have to promise to me Rei, you can't tell anyone."

"Usagi, if Mamoru's hurting you -" Rei began.

Usagi cut her off. "No, Rei, I can handle this. I don't need to be saved."

Rei bit her lip, but nodded. "If - if you ever need help."

Usagi squared her shoulders and smiled the first genuine smile she'd had in a while. "Thanks, Rei."

"Anytime, Princess." Rei smiled and left the room. Usagi sat on the bed and wept.

* * *

It was almost dark when Usagi arrived at her home, Chibiusa sleeping soundly in the strolled she pushed. The lights in the house were off.

"Good, maybe Mamoru's at work." Usagi thought. She slid the key into the doorknob and quietly opened the door, being careful not to awaken her napping daughter. She only got as far as the living room when a lamp was turned on. She blinked against the sudden light, using a hand to shield her eyes.

"Mamoru?" she asked timidly. "Is that you?"

"Where have you been?" Usagi froze at the iciness in his voice. "Oh god." she thought. "Not in front of the baby." She lowered her hand and looked at her husband. He was sprawled on the couch, a cup of sake in his hand, a nearly empty bottle besides him.

"Just with the girls." Usagi said, false cheeriness in her voice.

"Did I say you could leave the house?" Mamoru was clearly drunk, but he didn't slur any of his words, and he didn't seem unsteady. Mamoru didn't become any of those things when he became drunk - he became violent.

"Sorry isn't good enough!" He threw the heavy glass sake bottle at Usagi and it barely missed her.

"Please... don't!" Usagi sobbed. She glanced down at her daughter.

"Don't tell me what to do in my own house! Who the fuck do you think you are?!" Mamoru leapt off the couch and before she could react he had a handful of her hair.

"Mamoru... please..." Usagi could barely speak around the sobs that were choking her.

"Mamoru, please!" he mimicked in a cruel high pitched voice. "Don't worry about the brat, she'll be fine." He struck out at the strolled with his foot, causing it to sail into a corner of the room. It did not turn over, though. Chibiusa awoke and started wailing.

"Chibiusa!" Usagi tried to run to her daughter, but Mamoru still held her fast by her hair.

"Uh-uh, I don't think so bitch." Mamoru tugged cruelly at her hair. He ripped open her blouse and buttons exploded in the air. Mamoru bit her on the part of her breast that was exposed above her bra. Usagi cried out in pain. "I think it's time you and I had some fun..."


	4. Escape

Usagi lay on the floor of their living room, her entire body throbbing from the brutal beating her husband had given her the night before. Faint light spilled across the room through a curtained window, bright enough so that she could see her blood splashed on the tatami mats that made up the floor. After Mamoru had finished he had fallen asleep on top of her, but sometime in the middle of the night he had stumbled off to their bedroom.

She attempted to gather around her what few shreds remained of her clothing, tried to get up so she could check on Chibiusa, who still lay in her bassinet in the corner. Usagi had heard her fuss a few times during the night, but apparently even the baby knew not to waken Mamoru. She continued her attempt at rising, tears trickling from the corners of her eyes and small whimpers emanating from her throat from the pain. Her whole body felt like a bruise, it felt like she'd never be able to get up again. But she knew she had to, had to get up before Mamoru awoke, had to grab Chibiusa and get away, far, far away.

Usagi managed to get up on her hands and knees and started crawling towards her baby. Fighting back tears and wincing the whole way, she was finally able to make it to the bassinet. Chibiusa lay inside, eyes wide open, one tiny fist thrust inside her mouth. Usagi managed a small smile upon seeing that she was alright, although desperately in need of a diaper change and probably starving. But there was no time for that, Chibiusa's needs would have to be taken care of once they had escaped.

Usagi steadied herself on the bassinet and managed to pull herself up. She reached inside a hidden pocket underneath the lining and withdrew a cellphone. Ever since the Mamoru's violent temper had escalated she had taken to hiding her and Chibiusa's important papers, whatever money she'd managed to scrimp together and a cell phone there, just in case of a situation just like this one, though she could never have imagined something as awful as what he had done to her last night. She dialed the number for the Hikawa Shrine and while it rang she pushed the bassinet slowly and quietly towards the front door, glad that she had bought one with wheels, and prayed that Chibiusa would remain silent. She managed to open the door quietly, sneak out, and close it quietly behind her. Walking as quickly as her extensive injuries would allow, she started to flee, not caring what the neighbors would think about what it looked like.

"Hikawa Shrine, Rei speaking."

"Rei." Usagi sobbed.

"Usagi?" Rei asked worriedly. "Is everything okay?"

"It's awful, Rei." Usagi continued down the sidewalk as fast as she could go, looking over her shoulder every few seconds to make sure Mamoru hadn't realized she was missing yet. It still wasn't very bright out, yet, but she never knew what Mamoru would be up to anymore. "I need... I need you to come pick me and Chibiusa up." She gritted her teeth as the pain began to come in fresh waves, not sure how much longer she could keep it up.

"I'm on my way." Rei said.

Usagi sobbed again, this time in relief. She hung up the phone and tucked it in back in the bassinet.

Rei was soon able to find Usagi, not far from her home. She pulled the car over, quickly exiting it and crossing over to where Usagi was still determinedly pushing the bassinet. Her blouse was ripped open and all the buttons were missing, she could see the threads where they used to be. Her skirt was badly ripped and tattered and she wasn't wearing any undergarments. Most of her skin was covered in abrasions and contusions and she had a split lip. Rei was surprised she could walk at all.

"Got to keep walking." Usagi mumbled. "Can't let him get us." She didn't seem to be aware of Rei's presence.

"Usagi!" Rei took her best friend gently by the shoulders and stopped her.

Usagi looked up at her. "You've got to save Chibiusa." Exhausted, she collapsed.


	5. Rescue

A voice was calling her name. "Usagi... Usagi, wake up..." _No, let me sleep a little bit longer._ The voice became more persistent. She opened her eyes a crack and cringed as fireworks seemed to explode in front of her and her pupils became pinpricks. She could barely make out the form of her friend.

"Rei?" She managed to open her eyes a little bit more, but everything was still blurry. "Where am I?"

"Usagi!" Rei's voice was filled with relief. "You're at the hospital."

"The... hospital?" Her vision cleared a little bit more and she was able to better see her surroundings: the hospital bed she was lying on, the i.v. in her arm and the flimsy gown she was wearing, and the mottled bruises on the few patches of unbandaged skin. She began to remember the events that had led to her current predicament. "Oh God... is Chibiusa...?"

"Chibiusa's fine." Rei said, stroking her friend's hand. "Ami, Makoto and Minako are all babysitting her at the shrine."

"Do they know?" Usagi's voice trembled.

"No." Rei said. "I wasn't sure if you'd want me to tell them."

Rei could see the relief on Usagi's face.

"Usagi." Rei's tone was sober. "You can't let this keep happening. You have to press charges against him." They both knew who 'him' was.

"I don't think I can, Rei." Taking a deep breath, she said: "I still love him."

Rei shook her head. "Usagi, look at what he's done to you. Look at what he's done to Chibiusa!"

"I know! I know!" Usagi cried. "He used to be so different, Rei. I don't know what's happened to him. Maybe... maybe he could change back? Maybe he could be my Mamoru again."

"And you would forgive him, just like that?" Rei was shocked. "Do you know how close he came to killing you? The next time this happens, he probably will! And what about Chibiusa? How long before he starts abusing her?"

Usagi gave a keening wail, tears streaming down her face.

"Just promise me that you'll think about it." Rei said, her voice calmer. Usagi nodded, unable to speak. "And promise me you won't go right back to him."

Rei handed her a tissue and Usagi wiped her face and blew her nose. "Where will I go?"

"You can stay at the shrine with Yuichiro and me." Usagi started to protest and Rei quickly cut her off. "No buts, Usagi. You're our family, of course we want to take care of you. We love you."

"Thank you, Rei." Usagi murmured. "Thank you for everything..." Usagi drifted off to sleep, but before she did, she could hear Rei's faint reply of "You're welcome."


	6. Memories

_Beta'd by The Seventh L_

Usagi held Chibi-usa in her arms, finally able to care for her baby after weeks of not being able to due to intensely painful bruising on most of her body. Her body was finally starting to heal, the bruises fading and the cuts knitting together; with some of them turning into scars whose pinkness shined on her delicate pale skin. Chibi-usa had been taken care of by the other scouts the whole time Usagi was convalescing and they had been told her tragic tale. She had made them promise not to exact revenge on Mamoru, which had been extremely hard, especially with the fiery Haruka. Only her tears convinced them. Almost all of them still had dreams of what they would like to do to him if given a chance.

She buried her face in her daughter's hair. "I'll never let him hurt you." She continued to rock her back and forth until they were both lulled to sleep.

-----

Each day she grew stronger and stronger and there was still no sign of Mamoru. She still jumped at every loud noise and flinched whenever anyone reached for her. Still hid whenever she heard the door open, afraid it would be him, but at the same time perversely hoping he would try to take her back. She felt ashamed every time she missed him or thought of all the happy times they had spent together, like she was betraying Chibi-usa and all the other scouts.

She knew that he didn't want her back and she knew that she see it as a good thing. Rei had found all of her and Chibi-usa's things mixed in with the trash at the collection site by their house and had rescued them.

But she still hadn't taken off her wedding ring. When she was checked out of the hospital it had been the only possession she'd had to pick up, and she'd slipped it on when nobody was looking. Rei hadn't mentioned it but she could see the look that crossed the other girl's face if she happened to glance at it. Not disappointed, just worried.

Most of all Usagi missed her parents and her brother. She hadn't been able to visit them since "the incident", as she referred to it when she had to. She didn't want to see the worried looks on their faces, or worst of all, shame. But her constant excuses wouldn't be able to hold them off forever and she knew it and tried not to think about it.

-----

Usagi stood in front of the bathroom mirror, brushing out her long blonde hair, getting it ready to place it in their customary odangos. Running the brush through her hair, she let her mind drift . . .

_"I love your hair," Mamoru whispered into her ear, sliding one hand through her luxurious tresses. It was their wedding night and they lay naked in each others arms in bed, cuddled in the rumpled sheets. He held up a loose handful of her hair and let it slide through his fingers. "So beautiful." He kissed a lock of her hair. "You're so beautiful, Usagi. I love you."_

_"I love you too, Mamoru."_

Usagi shook her head, trying to dislodge the image, before continuing brushing her hair.

_"Mamo-chan!" Usagi giggled as her husband placed a braided crown of daisies on her head._

_"Now you really look like a queen," Mamoru said. He lay down beside her on their picnic blanket and spoke at her very obviously pregnant tummy. "And that makes you a princess, sweetie." Usagi gazed down lovingly at her husband and unborn child._

Usagi ran the brush roughly through her hair, a frown on her face.

_"Mamoru!" Usagi gasped in pain as his hand fisted painfully in her hair._

_"Shut up!" he yelled, violently pulling her towards him. All Usagi could do was shield her face as he began striking her._

Usagi grimaced and threw the hairbrush down onto the floor. It seemed like everything was a painful reminder of her husband. Memories were constantly welling up, both good and bad, and both types were equally painful. She would do anything to help ease the pain. Making up her mind, she began searching the bathroom for what she needed to get the job done. Standing in front of the mirror, she grimaced, and began.


End file.
